My name is Kat, and I grew up in a traumatic environment. I was the kid who daydreamed through class, never studied, and had straight A’s. When I was 12, my dad took me from my mom’s house in Texas, and drove me out to California to live with him. He immediately put me in therapy to work through what I’d experienced.

This was a wonderful choice on his part- trauma therapy is important for anyone who experiences it.

I was able to learn all about myself, my triggers, and my responses. While doing this work, however, my grades began to slip. My teenage years were difficult with school, and my dad & I fought constantly over grades. I had many panic attacks after our talks.

Now, almost 10 years later, I’ve learned I have ADHD- very commonly diagnosed in childhood, not at 22.

When I told my dad about it, he said, “Well a neighbor told me to have you tested, but her kids were four and five, and hopped up on Adderall,” instead of anything else he could’ve said. I explained that as an early childhood educator, I know that’s around the age children start getting screened for this diagnosis.

After the initial rage, I realized something; those hours-long fights until midnight weren’t merely upsetting to me as a child. They were traumatizing. The yelling, slamming doors, forcing me to stand, all affected me just how the physical trauma did. I’m not ashamed to admit, we haven’t spoken since then.

I’ve been on a journey the last few months, relearning what it means to have trauma.